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Is being selfish ever a good thing? Well it can be, and that is what we are exploring this Monday. Let’s look at when it’s ok to be selfish, and how sometimes this can actually be beneficial to us.
Have you traveled by plane recently? You know that rather annoying part of the flight where the instructions are given on how to save yourself if the plane goes down in a billow of flames? Yes that part. It makes mention that oxygen bags will fall and how to use them properly. Each time the instructions were very clear. Place the oxygen on yourself before helping any children with you. Ya hear that? Place the oxygen on yourself before helping any children with you.
Hmmm. I think the airlines might be on to something.
So let’s think about it. What good could you possibly be to a scared child if you don’t have the oxygen to give you the life (literally) to do so? I was thinking how true this is in so many other areas of parenting and life in general. I’ve had nights I have stayed up late to do laundry or get the kitchen clean only to wake up ridiculously crabby and unable to function. I have skipped lunch or had a half of my dinner in order to make sure everyone else was fed or that dishes got done or that load of laundry got taken out in time so that it did not wrinkle too bad. Does this all make me a better mom? A better person? Well…no. I don’t think so.
So what makes us better? Rest. Lots of it. Eating well. Drinking lots of water. Having time to ourselves. Quiet time. Uninterrupted, curled up with a good book time. Long showers. Buying something just for ourselves. Feeling no guilt. Taking time to stretch. To think about what it is that we need or want.
Some would say this makes one selfish. But let’s disagree. Just think of it as saving yourself. Because after all, what good can you be to others if you have no life left in you?
I sometimes think as parents, employees, and people in general we have been conditioned to think that unless you are worn and ragged, you aren’t giving it your all. We think we are only worthy of the cold spaghetti left over on the plate at dinner time, or the few hours of sleep we manage to squeeze in a night, or the two minute shower we managed to wrestle in. We think if we want more, that makes us bad or selfish. Or even worse, both.
It is high time we start thinking otherwise. To start putting the oxygen over our own mouths before we start dishing it out to everyone else.
By taking time to yourself. Real alone time. Read a book, or a magazine article. Take a moment to put lotion on your hands or just run a brush through your hair. Have a cold glass of ice water or your favorite soda join you. Use a pretty glass. Set it on a bright cocktail napkin. Sit still, and just breathe.
So save yourself. Be a little selfish. Place the oxygen so to speak on yourself first so you can then be of value to others.
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Happy Monday!